These past couple of days have been rough. Wish we could rewind to April & none of this would've happen. Jacob would be here with us & our happiness would be back. I was strong when I had to be & now & then I still am but recently everything has come back like a flash flood. I'm on step 5 of 7 in the grieving process & I feel like I am going backwards. Anger is so bad, wish all these feelings would disappear. After 2 mos, yesterday I visited w my niece (2 y/o old) & nephew (2 mos old), I held back tears until I got home last night. Our nephew was born after Jacob passed so its still fresh when I am with them. I know in time I will feel better but not sure when. I hope soon in time after this has healed god will bless us with another baby.
Bereaved Parents Wish List Compiled by Diane Collins 1. I wish my baby hadn't died. I wish I had him back. 2. I wish you wouldn't be afraid to speak my baby's name. My baby lived and was very important to me. I need to hear that he was important to you also. 3. If I cry and get emotional when you talk about my baby, I wish you knew it isn't because you have hurt me. My baby's death is the cause of my tears. You have talked about my baby, and you have allowed me to share my grief. I thank you for both. 4. Being a bereaved parent is not contagious, so I wish you wouldn't shy away from me. I need you now more than ever. 5. I need diversions, so I do want to hear about you; but I also want you to hear about me. I might be sa...
I wake up this morning at 6:30am. Thinking of why am I awake but It is because I wasn't feeling good last night and went to sleep about 9:30pm, not like me at all. So right now it is 8:40am I am at the computer typing a new blog. The doggy and DH are still asleep. * I think often of Jacob but isn't in a numb, why us way like it was in the beginning. I have learned to cope with loosing him and understand why he passed. I do still have those days where I am so lost and confused I have no one to talk to about how I am feeling. I get told very often that others do not know how I am doing this after loosing Jacob and how I am so strong. I truthfully don't know either I am just living life and having faith in god. I do tell my mom that when I visit, she always asks me how am I dealing with the grief and I tell her " mom I just have to be strong and tell myself that it will be okay and we will make it thru this. Not a day goes by that I think of my angel and of course I ...
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